Changing my Reactions to Criticism

I will make my long story short...when I went in for my pre op testing, they found a large tumor on my thyroid and then two smaller ones.  After some testing my endocrinologist and ent said the best course of action was removing my whole thyroid.  It wasn't news I wanted to hear but eventually after research and talking to doctors, I realized that removing my thyroid would help my sleeping (it is currently bending my trachea off to the side and probably explains my sleep apnea ) and indirectly the MDs said it might improve my weight loss efforts since I'll be better rested and since my hormone levels would be stable.  My dad calls and tells me that if I hadn't over eaten sugar and diet drinks; I probably wouldn't have this problem.  He also said if I had actually exercised hard I probably wouldn't have my current weight problem or thyroid condition.  Considering the fact that I'm scared my impending thyroidectomy and taking medication the rest of my life...it was not a lecture I wanted to hear.

Even at the age of 46, talking to my dad sends off triggers and I feel like a teenager.  Agggh...he always tells me he loves me etc but he is overly critical too.  It always upsets me to talk to him.  He is one person I would never tell about the band. 


Although he always upsets me, he makes me so appreciative of:

1)  My husband and his unconditional love and thoughtfulness.
2) The fact that I've been able to create a family life with my husband and kids that is much healthier than my family of origin.
3) The lap band surgery that is bringing me closer to a better health state every day. 
4)  The fact that pre op testing discovered my thryoid condition and that surgery will improve my sleep and overall functioning.
5)  The health insurance my firm provided which provided me with the coverage to get the band.









 Thanks for listening...I'm trying to see the blog as a little bit of therapy everyday.