One of the reasons I wanted to lose weight was because I felt that people judged me because of my weight and underestimated my abilities. I felt this at work. As a management consultant, I felt that my fat and my fat clothes were a handicap in the beautiful world of management consulting. Christine at Phonenix Revolution pointed out that while there is weight discrimination, I should watch how I conduct myself and interact with others. Do I interact confidently? Do I state things affirmatively with conviction? Do I hide behind my weight? Do people pick up on my second guessing? That made me think
I think its a combination of both. Yes, fat discrimination exists but I was using my fat as an excuse, as a shield. Although I'm in the beginning of my journey and have only lost 10 lbs; I decided to take Christine's words to heart and to put myself out there in a more confident manner. Even though its only been 10 lbs, its the jump start I needed. I started speaking more confidently, asking for jobs/projects. I'm now doing a project I really enjoy with a client I actually like. I realize its all relative. I know people who weigh 130 lbs who feel fat and wait and long for the day when they are think and can live out their dreams. I want to live now versus later, when I reach my dream weight. Me at the weight of 212 is starting to live my dreams...and make them come alive one day at a time.
Since getting banded 9/15/2010...it crystalized in my mind that I have to stop hiding behind my fat and start living my life. I realize that a large part of this journey is mental, not just physical and weight related.
Thanks for listening.