My Banded Time

Monday, October 25, 2010

Post Traumatic Support Group Trauma

The week before I had surgery, I had to go in for pre op testing and I had to sit in on a nutrition support group.  It was about 1/3 bandsters and 2/3 gastric bypass/sleeve.  The GB(gastric bypass folks) told us that their surgeon (we are all part of the same surgery practice) told them to forget about the lap band because it doesn't work for most.  One of the women was there for her 2nd GB.  She lost 150 and gained 100 and now she was doing it again.  She was saying that GB is the way to go.  And while the weight loss community/lap band community is so warm and nurturing, a lot of these women were very loud, exhibitionist and boasting about the hot bods they would have by Christmas.  The other women were really quiet.  Maybe they were intimidated by the loud ones.  It was really strange.

Can I tell you...I felt horrible!!!  I felt scared about going under the knife and stupid for making this commitment and having fears of failure.  

I think blogging has cured me.  To quote many of you, this journey is more mental than physical.  The lap band is only a tool to facilitate the journey.  It won't do it for you.  I'm seeing a therapist now, blogging and avoiding the support group.

Do any of you attend regular support groups?

9 comments:

  1. I haven't gone to any..only because I think my area is too rural. I have heard others say what you expressed today in your post. I haven't been banded yet..soon!..very soon...so, I am pretty dang sure that group would scare me to death! I like your ideas about it being a tool..some of thoe other ladies sound like they have quite a problem.

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  2. It seems that any class I have to attend pre surge that has been half and half lap/bypass has been so negative against lap band. It doesn't work...it is slow...it is blah blah. I am sorry but reading these blogs has proved to me that this works...not easily but it works. I plan on working hard and this will work. I can't even imagine going through that much trauma to have a second BP. Perhaps because in BP there is no "thing" implanted in you body they can't see it as a tool. Where to me it makes fantastic sense.

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  3. I think it is human nature to believe that our opinions and ideas are the "right" ones. The fact is that lap-band is right for some people while the sleeve and RNY are right for others. I chose lap-band because 1) it was cheaper 2) it was less invasive 3) it was "rechargable" (through fills you can get an extra boost and additional restriction as needed). With RNY if it doesn't "work", the only option is to have the surgery again. It is major surgery and it means pretty significant changes each time they alter the stomach.

    What I have found after having the surgery is that it isn't necessarily slower weight-loss. I've lost 90 lbs. since February. That is pretty comporable to RNY-rate of loss. I can eat ANY food. While some Bandsters cannot tolerate bread, pasta, etc., I prefer a rate of restriction that allows me to eat all foods in moderation.

    You have to be diligent about getting fills and you must be patient. Some people have to get multiple fills before they get good restriction (3-5 is average). It isn't perfect, but it was the right choice for me!

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  4. GB scared the crap out of me! At our support group, only a hand full had lap band. I am very happy with the lap band. I have done very well and I feel great! I too can eat anything...bread, pasta, rice...etc. My fills are very conservative and I lose 1-2 lbs a week. I am happy with that. I think in the long run you will be happy with the lap band.

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  5. I have not been to one. I consider this group of bloggers my support group. If I didn't have them then I would probably look for something but luckily I have all of you! BTW we have the same background!

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  6. Oh Mercy.. I'm going to my first support group meeting tomorrow... Thanks for the head's up!

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  7. Hi! Welcome to the Lap Band world! Just found your blog and I am so excited for the months ahead for you! It's so important to find a positive, healthy new outlook on life and I would say if this support group is a downer, find another one! You need positive, uplifting things in your life not a PTSD experience, ugh! And definetely keep reading the blogs, cause we are an awesome group of ladies who know what it feels like in each others shoes. Wishing you the best! :)

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  8. I haven't attended the support group meetings my surgeon offers. He only does lapband though so I think it would be a different environment. I agree with another poster that lapband isn't for everyone and neither is gastric bypass. I think with a decision this personal, people just feel the need to defend it to the death.

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  9. I had to attend a meeting as part of my pre-surgery approval and to tell you the truth I HATED it! I blogged about it I think the next day. I honestly was so surprised about how some of the people were being. Completely b*tching about everything under the sun. The whole meeting all I sat at thought was...I've got my blogger girls and that's all I need. I know that is all I need because every time I need something you all are there. Good Luck!!!

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